As I was contemplating Kate Gosselin’s pitiful turn on Dancing With The Stars in that ugly Pepto-pink dress, I fleetingly wondered what her useless ex husband, Jon, was up to. Then I quickly dismissed that thought because it’s better not to question it too much and risk jinxing it. Wouldn’t you know it – today there’s news about Jon and it’s predictably not flattering. The father of eight, who has said that he’s too famous to work a regular job, was just fired from his last one – which consisted of lounging around his 25 year-old girlfriend’s house eating and drinking.

While his ex-wife, Kate Gosselin, is strutting her stuff on Dancing With the Stars, Jon Gosselin is going to be spending his nights alone. Morgan Christie, 25, Jon’s third girlfriend since his divorce from Kate last June, has kicked — or rolled — the former Jon & Kate Plus 8 dad out of the Santa Barbara residence where he was languishing and packing on pounds. “It was five months of his pure laziness and her mounting frustration,” a pal close to Morgan tells In Touch exclusively. “She couldn’t take it anymore. He was lying around all day long, not contributing to anything and not working. He doesn’t even have his own friends. He even mooched his social life off of her.”

Jon and Morgan met in Park City, Utah, in late 2009, but kept their relationship under the radar. “They were so into each other at first; he put on the whole show for her family just like he did with Hailey Glassman and her parents,” the pal reveals. But Jon was forced to pack up his stuff on March 21 and hit the road. “She’s very relieved.”

[From In Touch Weekly, received via e-mail]

I have to object to the first link in the last paragraph “Jon and Morgan met in Park City, Utah, in late 2009, but kept their relationship under the radar.” That’s in no way accurate because these two fools were making out and grabbing swag all over Sundance earlier this year. They also would regularly call the paparazzi and generally acted more entitled than A-list celebrities.

It really sounds like this story is straight from Morgan, who consented to being profiled in a glowing piece in People Magazine all about how great she was because she had graduated from college and was into fashion. Nevermind that the girl didn’t have a job and was living off her rich family. I doubt Morgan thinks a little blurb in People was worth months of dealing with passive aggressive, freeloading Jon. Surely she had dreams of being famous and attending exclusive parties as the girlfriend of Jon “tiny peen” Gosselin. Will she be granting a tell-all while Jon mopes his ass around to whichever celebrity outlet will have him? I expect his doughy face to be making an appearance again soon. There goes my gratitude for the lack of news about him.