Dina Lohan gave an “exclusive” interview to Radar in which I think she’s trying to deny Lindsay Lohan’s extensive financial and credit problems, but Dina ends up just being tragically hilarious. There’s actual video of Dina saying this sh-t, just so you know (video here), but Radar provided a handy transcript of the denial. First of all, Dina will have you know that Lindsay is not $600,000 in debt, and she knows this because she is “in contact with Lindsay’s business managers every day.” Of course Dina is. Because she’s still living off her daughter. However, although Dina claims that Lindsay is too focused on spending her money to actual pay attention to her money, Dina admits that “you know, a bill may be a little late or not, you know, but that’s pretty normal. That happens to me, that happens to everyone.” Granted. But I don’t have $600,000 bills.

Additionally, Dina denies that Lindsay is out every night clubbing and partying and getting f-cked up. Dina basically claims that we’re using images of Lindsay from one night over and over again. Ah… we’re not, Dina. Trust me. She also calls Lindsay a “child” again. Oh, and this is the best quote ever: “She has her 6126 clothing line which is doing amazing. We’re in Neiman Marcus, Bloomingdales… she designs everything from soup to nuts.” Quote of the year!

Dina Lohan is going on the record about her daughter Lindsay’s reported financial troubles. In an exclusive interview with RadarOnline.com, the Lohan matriarch denies her daughter owes $600,000 in credit card debt, but does reveal that there have been some shakeups among those keeping tabs on Lindsay’s bank account.

“She is not going into credit card debt. Absolutely not. And her business managers… I actually am in contact with them every day,” Dina told RadarOnline.com. “And you know Lindsay will spend money but she has people that run what she does. We had another manager that we’ve now moved. We kind of cleaned house and we have somebody else who… I mean everyone was great but we just needed to clean house and start over. So Lindsay doesn’t really pay her bills. Someone else does, so they wouldn’t let her do that.

“And in the interim, you know, a bill may be a little late or not, you know, but that’s pretty normal. That happens to me, that happens to everyone,” Dina continues. “Lindsay isn’t in charge of her finances, other people are and we are keeping a close eye on the people who are managing her.”

When it comes to reports of Lindsay’s all-night partying, Dina says the stories are fabricated and overblown.

“People don’t understand how the press manipulates and how they make something look as it seems when it’s completely opposite,” she told RadarOnline.com. “What you read in the press is completely fabricated. If a girl… any child… a girl in the business goes out one night, you’ll see magazines for the next two weeks and they’re wearing the same outfit. So it’s the same night!”

Despite Dina’s positive outlook on Lindsay’s current life, there is no denying that in recent years, the actress’ film roles have declined significantly both in quantity and quality. Her last movie Labor Pains, went straight to DVD. Is Lindsay hurting for money? Dina says absolutely not.

“She has her 6126 clothing line which is doing amazing,” she says. “We’re in Neiman Marcus, Bloomingdales… she designs everything from soup to nuts. She just signed a deal with a hand bag company-same company- and it’s flourishing. She also has her Sevin Nyne tanning spray and a couple of movie offers in the pike.”

Is Dina in a state of denial? Maybe. Or maybe she would just rather deal with her family’s personal issues behind closed doors.

“I’m not going to talk about any personal issues with my children,” she says. “But I’m speaking for any single mother or couples across the world, when I say that I just want my kids to be healthy, happy and safe. I’m a religious person and I pray for them all the time. But you have to let them go. You have to let them fall and get hurt and then get back up and then be there for them. I really don’t like going back but it’s time that we have to stand up for ourselves and tell the truth, and the facts are the facts.”

[From Radar]

I’m still laughing at the “from soup to nuts” line. How much would you pay for “Blohan Peanuts”? How about “Lindsay’s Tomato Bisque, With Crack”? Or “The Milkaholic’s Clam Chowder”? What kills me though is that after Dina goes on and on in her delusional way about how Lindsay is JUST FINE and explains everything in detail, Dina then falls back onto the “I’m not going to talk about it” line. Dina, the jig is up. Take care of your kids. Get Ali away from Lindsay, lest Ali go down with the sinking ship.