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Us Weeky has the highlights from Paris Hilton's new interview in Blender magazine, and they're hilarious. She "f'in hates" when fans touch her, cries when listening to her own album, and reveals that her baby-doll act and insane ambition were inspired by her narcissistic grandmother.
The best part, though, is that her mom Kathy told her that acne scars were caused by giving oral sex. At age 19, Paris supposedly believed her:
Maybe Pink believes this too, and that's why she thinks blowjobs are gross.
Is it surprising that at the age of 19 Paris was as gullibe and uninformed about sex as the average grade school student? Maybe she wouldn't be as successful if she wasn't that stupid. It's a good thing for her that she never finished high school.
Here are some pictures of Paris at an in-store appearance at Best Buy on August 18th and in Blender Magazine.
Thanks to Gossipin for the tip, and to Hollywoods Best for these photos.
I've come to the conclusion that British celebrities are dumber in love than their American counterparts. This is a gross overgeneralization based on Jude Law and Sienna Miller's foolish on-again off-again relationship, and Kate Moss' inexplicable draw to drug-addled Jaguar-wrecking Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty. Just last week Pete had to resort to getting an implant in his stomach to help him kick his love of most every type of drug, and that's good enough for lonely Kate, who was seen making out with him in public. Hopefully he took her money to get his nasty teeth fixed.
On Pete and Kate's big night out Pete was seen puking in a women's bathroom before wrecking the stage while performing with his band. Britian's Sunday Mirror says that taking drugs with a drug implant in your stomach will do that to 'ya:
The pair snogged in the corridor, with Kate, 32 acting more like a teenager... she couldn't keep her hands off his skinny butt.
It was definitely clear to all that love was in the air when a posse of young beauties walked past and shouted "Pete! We love you, Pete!"
In response, Mossy threw them a dirty look before sticking her tongue down his throat.
She hopes they'll live happily ever after now because pasty-faced Pete had a new anti-drug implant fitted last week and claims to be winning his fight to stay clean.
But fast-forward to two hours later. Pete, 27 - who was performing - showed little sign that he'd changed much when he barged into the women's toilets and, wait for it, puked his guts up.
I'm told all the ladies recoiled in horror and told potty Pete to get out but he kept shouting that he was in the men's loos.
Radar hopes the "reformed" druggie hasn't fallen back into his old ways - implants make you vomit violently if you take drugs. Things didn't get much better during the troubled rocker's performance with his band Babyshambles as he ended up wrecking the stage. He even managed to destroy the lighting rig.
It will take more than a little device or drug scandal to change Pete and Kate.
Posted to Drugs | Kate Moss | Pete Doherty | SmartSmartSmart
I wrote Snopes.com to ask them to fact check this story, because it sounds like complete bullshit to me, but Paris Hilton is said to have purchased a cemetary plot next to Marilyn Monroe for a "Billy Hilton," which was initially thought to be a poorly named deceased relative. It turned out that Billy was her goat. Someone made this shit up, but it's pretty funny:
A plot had been secured in the cemetery under the name of Billy Hilton and it was assumed it was for a Hilton family member.
Local and people with plots are disgusted by Hilton’s plan to bury an animal in the very human memorial park.
One local gentleman said: “It’s absolutely disgusting. Paris booked the plot for ‘Billy Hilton’. And everyone was very understanding about it, because they presumed it was one of her relatives.
“But it has transpired that it’s just an old goat. Normal people are content to bury their pets in the garden and done with it. But not Paris.
“This is one of the most prestigious cemeteries in the world, and it’s certainly not for animals. It should be reserved for beloved superstars.”
This simply can't be true. I did a half-assed google search, and it seems to have originated with a press release, which also claimed that Paris booked a gospel choir to perform at a funeral. Just like the rumor that Will Ferrell died in a freak para-gliding accident, someone cooked up a joke press release and now the dumber news services are picking it up.
Paris might have a whole zoo full of animals, but it's doubtful she loves her goat this much, or even knows where Marilyn Monroe is buried.
Posted to Paris Hilton | Pets | SmartSmartSmart
Britney Spears has shown the world how gullible she is by giving her husband an American Express Black card, also known as the Centurion. An invitation-only card with a hefty $2,500 annual fee, the Centurion gives holders automatic first class flight upgrades on all airlines and offers access to airport clubs and personal shoppers at luxury stores. It features a personal concierge and travel agent. If you can think it up, you can probably get it with an AmEx black card.
In the 1980s tales of the "Black" no-limit American Express card were just urban legends, but Amex responded to the black card lore and decided to offer it to high rollers. Now rappers name-drop it in songs, and uber-rich people have the opportunity to go deeper in debt than they ever dreamed possible.
By giving K-Fed access to her Amex Centurion, Britney is essentially letting him empty any bank account he wishes. He has the opportunity to spend lots of money in a very short time with a single phone call. Here's what people have done with the Centurion card:
Hey maybe AmEx can help K-Fed with his rapping career! He should call them up now that the black card is in his posession. They seem capable of hooking people up with just about anything.
Seriously, though, Britney is trusting her fortune to a guy who has a custom Ferrari worth more than a quarter of a million dollars, and a Maserati worth at least six figures. He also reportedly bought a $30,000 watch without asking Britney. Now is that the kind of person you would trust with your money?
Here's Britney dropping off a mini Escalade at her recording studios for Sean Preston to play with while she's there, and Kevin getting a haircut and pumping gas. Sean Preston, 11 months, took his first steps in Las Vegas last week. So now he must be old enough to drive a car, right?
Faded Youth scopes out X17's video of Britney shopping for toys and comes to the logical conclusion that she's having a baby girl this time around. She is seen looking at frilly girl's toys in the video. I was going to just report on the fact that Britney's having a girl, but then I found this awesome video taken on August 5th when she can't get into her car and has to ask the paparrazi if it's hers!
There must be a lot of black BMW SUVs in Britney's neighborhood.
Posted to Babies | Britney Spears | SmartSmartSmart | Video
Elizabeth Hasselbeck on "The View" is so out of touch with reality that she says using the morning after pill is the same as "birthing a baby and leaving it out on the street."
That is the shittiest slippery slope reasoning I have ever heard. Elizabeth had to be schooled by Barbara who said they should discuss the topic rationally. Watch this crap:
Let me just tell you that you can make your own morning after pill with common birth control pills. I read about first it in a health magazine, and had to use it once in college after an accident. The morning after pill is just a high dose of the hormones in regular birth control pills, so this is generally safe, but it's not comfortable and you should only do it if you have no other options. (You should also consult your doctor.)
You ovulate about 14 days give or take 3-4 days from the first day your period started. (If you have a regular 28 day cycle) So if you have an accident on the 20th day after the first day of your period you're probably ok, but only use this guideline to take measures in case of an accident and not to have unprotected sex, that's stupid.
If you want to go this route, just follow the instructions on the chart at the Planned Parenthood website.
Borrow a friend's pills or take some you have on hand.
If you you're using Triphasil or Tri-Levlen, for instance, take 4 yellow pills up to 72 hours after the accident. Wait 12 hours and take 4 more. Just follow the guidelines on the chart for the particular birth control you have.
Don't ever be afraid to take measures, especially early on, to take care of your body.
Posted to Politics | SmartSmartSmart | Television
Lindsay Lohan got a harsh letter from the CEO of the production company running her latest film, "Georgia Rule," that makes it clear that her bosses aren't buying the "heat exhaustion" excuse. I initially believed that Lohan was working every day and just had to go to the hospital once for whatever reason, because I'm gullible like that and there are plenty of pictures of her on set. It turns out that Lohan skipped a entire day of work and planned not to go in the next day, either.
Lohan's bosses are pissed that she showed up late to work a bunch of times and held up filming for a day, since
it costs big bucks to keep all those actors hydrated and gaffers fed. They sent a letter to the hotel she stays at last Wednesday.
You have acted like a spoiled child and in so doing have alienated many of your co-workers and endangered the quality of this picture.
This letter hit the Internet, thanks to The Smoking Gun, on Thursday. Instead of staying at home, maybe renting a movie or buying shit on eBay, Lohan was out partying again this weekend, and she didn't just stay close to home.
She went to Vegas with her boyfriend of one whole month and was seen at Jeff Beacher's variety show. She was photographed flashing her trademark peace sign.
Lohan has become a parody of herself and will have a steady career of increasingly more embarassing endorsements if she doesn't slow down and focus on her acting. Oh wait - she can sing too, right?
Lohan is shown at the show in question in Vegas on Saturday. She is also seen outside of The Ivy restaurant with her boyfriend, Harry Morton, who seems to think that a pack of cigarettes can shield him from the paparrazi.
Lohan and Morton got new tattoos in the wee hours of the morning last week, but they didn't pull a Scary Spice 'n Eddie Murphy, and opted instead for trite symbols that will last much longer than their relationship.
Pictures [via]
Singer George Michael was caught trawling for sex in a public place yet again. He was forced to come out in 1998 after being caught in a sting by an attractive policeman in a public bathroom in Los Angeles. He made fun of the incident in the video for his song "Outside" and talked about his shame on Oprah. Now that he's been caught having sex with a nasty old guy he's not going to play it off so easily.
News of the World investigators caught the singer red-handed and red-faced as he emerged from the bushes after cavorting with a pot-bellied, 58-year-old, jobless van driver.
When challenged George, 43, was wild-eyed and trembling. Trying to hide his face under a baseball cap, he screamed:
"I don't believe it! F*** off! If you put those pictures in the paper I'll sue!"...
The pair kissed and groped each other before going even further. It was all in a public place and totally illegal — just like the day in 1998 when George flashed at an undercover cop in a California park toilet.
News of the World followed the poor guy that George fondled back to his squalid flat in Brighton. They interviewed the guy and he gave the sordid details:
"He did it very well. That was one of his major points. Then it was fondling and mutual pleasuring. It wasn't full sex but it was fantastic."
Kirtland's confession then took a bizarre twist as he bragged: "There's a secret that I have which no one knows about. It's a personal thing.
"Most people pull away from it. But George actually seemed to respond.
"When we'd finished he said, ‘I've got to go. I've got to go somewhere and chill out.' And that was that.
"OK, I admit I was there for sex. But I'm astonished a man as famous as George should even think about doing it. It's potentially so dangerous."
That's nice that George didn't make fun of the old dude for whatever weird thing he's got going on down there. Maybe he's a woman or something. Whatever you're into.
When confronted by The News of The World snoops, who were either in the park for some random fun themselves or who routinely trail George Michael, George said "Are you gay? No? Then f*** off! This is my culture!"
That's like saying it's heterosexual culture to hook up with prostitutes, isn't it?
George Michael is about to embark on a 50-concert comeback tour, which sold out in a half hour.
Here are some low-res pictures from the article. They're too good not to publish.
2002 "Survivor: Thailand" winner Brian Heidik, 38, shot a defenseless puppy with a bow and arrow after coming home drunk at 3:30 in the morning. When his estranged wife asked him about it, he said he was "tired of stupid dogs on my back porch." Luckily for the puppy, Heidik is a bad shot:
The puppy, a 3-4 month old tan-and-black shepherd-hound mix, was reportedly shot below the rib cage but not seriously injured. Local animal control officers are scheduled to return both puppies to Jeff McCloud, a neighbor, on Thursday morning.
When sheriff's deputies arrived at the scene, Heidik, a 38-year-old former porn actor who was living in the Los Angeles area when he appeared on Survivor, allegedly attempted to flee in his car but was quickly caught and transported back to the Douglasville, GA home that he and his family had moved to in November 2004.
After Heidik was apprehended, Charmaine Heidik, a 34-year-old former porn actress and Playboy bunny who was charged with spousal abuse for punching Heidik back in November 2002, told the deputies that in addition to shooting the puppy, he had also hit her approximately ten days earlier on June 23. According to The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Charmaine Heidik told police that Heidik "had grabbed her by the face and pushed her down, bruising her forehead and elbow." Unspecified "evidence in the home" also reportedly supported the charge. The couple's son was also present in the home at the time of Heidik's arrest.
According to Charmaine Heidik, the puppy shooting followed a night in which Heidik had been out drinking with "buddies." After going to bed earlier in the night, she awoke to the sounds of a yelping dog at 3:30AM. Upon wandering out to the house's back porch, she saw Heidik holding the bow and arrow. "He just shoots the dog right in front of me," Charmaine Heidik told the Journal-Constitution. "I am tired of stupid dogs on my back porch," Heidik then allegedly remarked to her.
Heidik's defense was that he mistook the 3 month-old dog for a coyote that had killed two of his five year-old son's pet ducks.
Heidik appeared in several soft-core porn films before his "Survivor" win and says he is now producing a reality hunting show. He can't shoot or recognize prey, so it will either be a very bad or very entertaining series.
Heidik's wife says that he's never really adjusted to life post-Survivor and that he thinks he's "invincible."
The couple has several domestic battery incidents, with both Heidik and his wife alledging they were hit by the other. They are legally separated but have not yet filed for divorce.
Posted to Brian Heidik | Pets | SmartSmartSmart | Television
X17 loves to point out Britney's foibles, and their latest blog post tries to rile everyone up with a picture of Britney in the back of her Escalade holding Sean Preston. We don't see the car taking off with Sean Preston in Britney's lap, but it's implied.
Britney probably does all sorts of things that put her baby in danger, and maybe she's only caught a fraction of the time. Now that she's got a bad record, though, people are blaming her for things she hasn't even done. What do you think?
Like we said, we may not have seen everything – but this is what we saw. What do you see here?
Commentors are pretty annoyed that X17 doesn't bother to show Britney put Sean in his carseat, but did she do it? You can see the seat in the back.
Here are some more pictures from the series. You can see clearer unwatermarked versions in our image gallery from yesterday.
Britney Spears realized what a trashy loser people thought she was after her horrendous "Dateline" interview, in which she refused help from her publicists and didn't even have a hairdresser or makeup artist help her get ready. The pregnant singer chewed gum the whole time and bawled her eyes out when questioned about the parparrazi. She seemed arrogant and defensive and looked cheap in a super-short outfit.
Once Britney heard how poorly the interview was received she tried to do damage control by having professional portraits done. She shopped the pictures around to gossip mags at the sky-high price of $200,000. Britney called the gossip rags "trash" in her interview, and they showed her who was the trashy one by refusing to buy the pictures.
The only magazine willing to carry Britney's "classy" pictures and an interview was OK! Magazine - and they snatched them up at the bargain basement price of $5,000. When asked about the story and cheap photos, OK! said "Who doesn't love a discount?"
Britney, you're the discount. Get your ass in gear and get some media training.
Header photo from FadedYouth.
Posted to Britney Spears | SmartSmartSmart
The vacation is still on, but we're back posting sooner than expected because it's just not work to us to talk trash about celebrities.
In Britney's Dateline Interview she comes off defensive, rude, and dumb. She's even chewing gum, just like when she was announcing her pregnancy on Letterman! At one point she breaks down and cries when Lauer asks her "what do you think it will take to get the paparrazi to leave you alone?" While I feel sorry for her and don't blame her for crying, she didn't handle the first part of the questioning well at all.
She says of the incident where Child Protective Services visited her for Sean Perston's high chair fall that "they didn't have to come, the doctor there made them come because I didn't bring my doctor there with me." The doctor there made them come because her child was injured and they're required by law to contact Children and Family Services. That's idiotic to suggest the reason was because she didn't bring another doctor. She seems not to understand that is how CPS works.
When asked by Lauer if she tripped on her pants during the near baby-drop fiasco, she says, "I think, uh, actually, I didn't trip on anything, there was, a NY street, it was cobblestone... I think it was mixture of so many paparrazi and just how the road was all messed up, me just trying to get in the car." The road was perfecly flat and paved and not cobblestone at all. I live in Europe where there are real cobblestone streets and people manage to walk around holding all sorts of shit without stumbling and falling.
No fucking mention of the highball glass she was carrying at the time, and no admission of even partial guilt or regret for the incident. She blows it off, saying "accidents happen" and using the ridiculous example of her brother's multiple motorcycle accident at age 13 as a comparison. "Stuff happens with kids," she explains. Britney, you fucking idiot, you have total responsibility for your baby's safety and he's not the same as an adolescent boy.
She says she was crying afterwards because people were trying to take her picture, not because she almost hurt Sean. She also cals a woman ignorant for trying to take her picture at the time. "Ignorant" is not an adjective Britney should introduce into a conversation.
"There will be plenty more oopses, I'm human." Yes you are, and you're richer than 99.99% of the world. You can fucking hire someone to help you talk to the press and act like you actually take responsibility for your actions and care about your infant son.
"You have to realize that we're people, and we need privacy, and we need respect. Those are just things that you have to have as a human." This is your job, Britney, figure it out. The paparrazi are terrible and all but you need to find a better way to cope.
She does seem to love Sean even though she won't admit to any guilt or responsibility for his frequent safety mishaps.
Later in the interview she's in her element when talking about her music and her work, and she explains her brief involvement with the Kabbalah cult well. She has a new clothing line for children coming out, called "Baby Soul Rock and Roll," and she seems quite excited and happy about it.
While things seem to be looking up for her, she needs professional media coaching and she should never have done this interview.
Here is the relevant part of the interview:
This is part four in the series. Here are the earlier parts of Britney's interview:
Britney's Dateline Interview Part 1 of 4
Britney's Dateline Interview Part 2 of 4
Britney's Dateline Interview Part 3 of 4
Britney's Dateline Interview Part 4 of 4 (shown above)
And here she is with a drink in one hand and Sean Preston on her lap on a golf cart in Hollywood on June 8th:
[via]
Britney changed little SP's diaper at a Victoria's Secret lingerie store. She didn't try to be discreet by using one of the plushy ottomans in the dressing room and just plopped him down next the cash register. When she was done she handed the dirty diaper to the woman at the counter to throw away for her!
She could have changed his diaper in the car, a nearby bathroom, or in the dressing room, but instead she used the floor in a high traffic area of the store. How "country" of her.
Britney shocked diners at a restaurant in early March by changing Sean Preston's diaper - right on the table in front of other guests trying to enjoy their meals.
Perry may be hot, but he's a novice in the baby department and what Britney needs is an all-purpose baby coach to advise her on safety and etiquette issues. In other words - she needs some class!
She says the tabloids are too hard on her and that they've gone too far, but she continues to make deliberate dumb mistakes.
Here are screencaps from Britney's interview with Matt Lauer, which airs in its entirety tonight on Dateline. Thanks to BreatheHeavy.com for these photos and the composite image above. They also have portions of Britney's upcoming interview transcribed.
Sting's wife, Trudie Styler, was at her son's 21st birthday party at an exclusive nightclub in London, and had the brilliant idea to pop in the graphic video of her giving birth to him:
Sumner's guests at privileged club 'Drone' in London last week observed as the "gruesome" film played and he was embarrassed, to say the least.
A witness explains, "Everyone was totally shocked and just didn't know where to look when Trudie put the video on. It was very graphic and rather gruesome. Poor Jake turned bright red. It was certainly the most talked about part of the evening."
But his mother claims it was quite the contrary.
She says, "Jake's a film producer now so I thought it would be an idea to show his first film role. Afterwards he groaned, but secretly he was probably quite proud of it all and chuffed we made the effort. I honestly don't think he was that embarrassed. I think it was all quite sweet."
How fucking clueless do you have to be to think it's a good idea to show a birth video at your son's 21st birthday party? That's completely insane and utterly humiliating. What a dumb excuse she gave - he's a film producer. She could have screened some home movies and everyone would have been cooing. Instead she picked the most embarassing subject behind showing the conception video. Way to ruin your son's party.
No wonder Sting is addicted to strippers - his wife is crazy! She may be up to anything in the bedroom, but when you factor in her complete lack of common sense she must quite difficult to tolerate.
Here are Sting and Trudie at the "Louis Vuitton art talks" at the National Gallery in London on 5/25 and in Cannes. Sting looks like he barely puts up with her.
In an interview with Matt Lauer to air in Thursday night, Britney defends driving with her baby on her lap, saying that she often sat on her dad's lap as a child while he was behind the wheel, and that the practice is "country":
"I did it with my dad. I'd sit on his lap and I drive," the Louisiana native said. "We're country."
In this case "country" is code for "stupid," which is sure to piss off non city-dwellers everywhere.
Britney also defends her marriage with the absent Kevin, saying it's awesome that he's not living in the basement:
Opening up in an interview with NBC's Matt Lauer to be aired Thursday on the Today show and Dateline, the 24-year-old singer says it's not true that Federline is living in the basement, as some media have reported.
The paparazzi have "crossed the line a little bit" by showing her in private moments, she added. She also defended her parenting skills, saying, "I know I'm a good mom."
It's not true that Kevin's living in the basement because he's sleeping on a friend's couch in an apartment in Studio City, California and hasn't seen Britney in weeks. In her book that's awesome because Kevin is even more "country" than she is and she's afraid he'll endanger Sean Preston if he comes back to smoke up the house again with his pals.
It's sad that she thinks the paparrazi is the cause of her emotional state, but she should blame Kevin for that, not the hoards of photographers that follow her everywhere.
Posted to Babies | Britney Spears | Kevin Federline | Relationship trouble | SmartSmartSmart
BlogNYC ran a story about former playmate Stephanie Adams going batshit on a cabbie and then suing the NYPD for $5 million for being rough (topless photos NSFW) while arresting her for it. Adams promptly encouraged her "friends" on MySpace to bash BlogNYC and another reporting blog. Her "friends'" comments on the post are ad hominem attacks against the author, calling him "shitty" and criticizing the fact that he dared post a recap of the story. The papers who originally reported the story must have been beyond Adams' wrath since they don't accept comments.
Adams also sent a nasty all-caps e-mail to BlogNYC, threatening legal action if they didn't remove the photos they posted from her 14 year-old cheesy Playboy spread and dizzying mySpace. She tried to play herself off as her own shrieking publicist, but she couldn't hide behind her bad prose and caps lock.
YOU HAVE 24 HOURS TO REMOVE THESE PHOTOS OR WE WILL TAKE THE
APPROPRIATE LEGAL ACTION AGAINST YOU.
PUBLIC RELATIONS DEPARTMENT
---------------------------------------
WHILE 16 BOOKS RANGING FROM UNDER 100 PAGES (ONE BOOK) TO OVER 300
PAGES IS A GREAT DEAL MORE THAN SOME UNKNOWN WRITING ABOUT NOTEWORTHY
CELEBRITIES ON AN AMATEUR WEB SITE, THAT IS BESIDE THE CASE.
YOU DO NOT OWN THE COPYRIGHTS TO ANY OF THE PHOTOS AND THEY ALL HAVE
TO BE TAKEN DOWN.
THE PREVIOUS E-MAIL WAS COPIED TO PLAYBOY'S LEGAL DEPARTMENT IN
CHICAGO AND PLAYMATE PROMOTIONS IN CALIFORNIA REGARDING THE FOLLOWING:
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie_adams_04.php
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie_adams_05.php
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie_adams_13.php
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie_adams_14.php
AND GODDESSY OWNS THE COPYRIGHT TO THE FOLLOWING:
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie-handcuffs.php
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie_adams_08.php
http://blognyc.net/images/stephanie_adams_11.php
IF THE PHOTOS FROM GODDESSY ARE NOT TAKEN DOWN TODAY, WE WILL BE
CONTACTING OUR LEGAL DEPARTMENT TOMORROW.
IF THE PHOTOS FROM PLAYBOY ARE NOT TAKEN DOWN BY MONDAY, WE WILL SPEAK
WITH PLAYBOY'S LEGAL DEPARTMENT IN CHICAGO AND THEY WILL CONTACT YOU
DIRECTLY.
Poor Adams has to resort to yelling and citing her status as an author to get her point across, because she doesn't have the "capital" to sue over a critical blog post.
Adams is an out and proud lesbian, so while she's in touch with her sexuality she's not quite as aware of her personal failings. She believes she's some kind of psychic and offers "love readings," and "tarot readings" for $100 payable by PayPal on her website. The commentors attacking BlogNYC for writing an article about her are the same people who shell out $100 to get her shouted metaphysical e-advice.
She clearly has low self esteem. In an image caption on the front page of her website she writes "I never really cared about how others see me as much as I care about how I see myself when I look in the mirror." She's protesting too much. If that was true she wouldn't bother writing a single e-mail trying to silence bloggers.
These are Adams' MySpace pictures. So while her Playboy pictures might be copyrighted these pictures legally belong to MySpace, not her.
Paris' publicist, Elliot Mintz, has a great job. He has to come up with creative ways to lie and spin shit whenever Paris offends someone or is generally inconsiderate or dumb. Since she leaves the house nearly every day, he gets a lot of work. Last month he spread the unlikely story that a thief snatched a bagful of high end Mother's day gifts for Kathy Hilton that Paris was never seen shopping for. He was spotted in the firecrotch video trying in vain to do on-scene damage control. Now he's saying that Paris never left the scene of the crime after backing her Range Rover into a Honda in a parking lot, even though there's a video of the incident that shows her doing it.
Since he doesn't have much to go on, he uses the tried and true "paparrazi defense" favored by Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears:
The video showed scrapes on the bumpers of both vehicles.
The Range Rover stopped briefly then continued on toward the exit of the parking structure.
TMZ.com indicated Hilton failed to leave contact information for the Honda's owner and thus may have violated laws against hit-and-run. Her publicist denied that.
"Did she commit a crime? No," Elliot Mintz said.
"She was swarmed by paparazzi," he said. "The intensity of the lights, flashbulbs, momentarily disoriented her. She backed up, there was a minor fender-bender. No injuries. She then told me she notified one of the parking people at the facility how to contact her and asked the person to please pass that along" to the owner of the struck car.
"She did the correct thing and she would not leave the scene of a crime," he said.
Mintz said Hilton is insured.
"Paris is a very responsible and a very good driver. ... She takes her driving seriously," Mintz said. "This was unfortunate ... it will be handled appropriately."
Notice that Muntz doesn't state Paris' actions as fact, he said she told him that she left her contact information, which is different than saying she actually did it.
To be fair to Paris, a paparrazoa was asking her one of those dumb questions they always shout at celebrities to get their attention when she had the accident. Something like "Did you have fun shopping?" This actually works, because Jennifer Love Hewitt and Denise Richards answer those fools and have been videotaped having conversations with them.
Here's the video. She is seen saying goodbye to Kim Kardashian, Nick Lachey's new girlfriend, before getting into the car.
(This title is a play on Paris' song "Stars are Blind," and no offense is intended to our visually impaired readers - not that anyone would actually visit this site for the writing. We are also sorry that we don't use image alt tags because we're too lazy.)
Here is Paris in a "Stars are Blind" promo photoshoot and at the unveiling of "Idols Of Gay Hollywood" on June 8th. [via] Notice that this site has been relatively Paris Hilton-free for over a week.
Britian's The Sun, which we do not trust, is reporting that Britney and Kevin spent the weekend together and that Britney is upset that Kevin wants to make a movie that glorifies his psuedo-gansta past, similar to "8 Mile," except "8 Mile" was moderately accurate:
K-Fed, 28, plans to portray himself in the same mould as Eminem in 8 Mile — a tough rapper who’s risen from the streets.
But Britney, 24, fears he is going to cash in by dishing the dirt on their troubled relationship. A source said: “Britney has heard that Federline is working on a script and trying to get funding for the film.
She is really upset. Britney fears Kevin just wants to promote himself at her expense to further his career.”
The couple have grown increasingly distant. But Britney, above, is desperate to save the marriage before their second child arrives in the autumn.
She and Kevin spent the night in a hotel suite in Laguna Beach, California, at the weekend — and continued talking the next day.
Now, if Britney and Kevin spent the weekend together, why do they mention it as an afterthought? They haven't been photographed together in over two months and this would be huge news. The paparazzi follow them everywhere and there's no way this part of the story is true.
It might be true that Kevin is planning a film based on his life though. That sounds like the sort of thing the incompetent rapper would try. He claims to have been in a gang in Fresno, California, but he was vague and declined to give details because there aren't any.
"I'm not gonna sit here and say that I'm this grimy, gutter, gangsta. But I have been on the hustle."
Kevin, you've only hustled for Britney's money, and that's pretty inventive of you but it doesn't really make you capable of a film career beyond the unwatchable "Chaotic."
In related news, a couple of days ago we reported that Britney was going to design baby clothes. It's probably true because sleuths at Socialite's Life discovered that Britney has trademarked her infant son's name, Sean Preston, suggesting that she's planning a line of clothing under his name.
Here are outtakes from Britney's magazine spread for Glamour UK. The official pictures came out in early May of this year. [via]
We reported yesterday that Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt got her middle name from her architecture-loving daddy Brad, who admires French architect Jean Nouvel. The source we quoted thought Shiloh might be a tribute to the place where Brad and Angelina made sweet love to conceive the baby, but said that was uncertain:
It turns out that there's a Shiloh in California and Brad and Angelina were there nine months before the tot was born. How freaking original:
That's dumb, especially since Shiloh is a weird name that's hard to pronouce. David and Victoria Beckham named their first son Brooklyn after his place of conception, but they're not as bright as the Jolie-Pitts and can be forgiven for using such a trite baby-naming convention. Brooklyn also isn't that bad of a name for a boy.
Not only is Shiloh going to have to live with that weird name, she'll be cursed with visions of her parents having sex when people ask her how she was given her unique moniker. Even if your parents are super hot like Brad and Angelina, you still don't want that image in your head.
Posted to Angelina Jolie | Babies | Brad Pitt | Brangelina | Sex | SmartSmartSmart
When I first saw these pictures of Britney driving with Sean Preston slumped over in his carseat in the back I thought, "oh, how cute, my son does that too." The thing is, I was thinking of him sleeping in his stroller, not his car seat. I also forgot that my son's car seat was until recently rear-facing as is required by law in the states for children under the age of one. My son never falls over like that when he's sleeping in the car, because he's strapped in tight.
Britney could get in trouble with Children and Family Services yet again:
"It's far safer if the seat is facing backwards to avoid head-on injuries and whiplash in case of a collision," said California Highway Patrol spokesman Tom Marshall.
Spears, 24, "could be" cited for violating Section 27360 of the California Vehicle Code, which says child safety seats must be installed to comply with the federal standard.
"We would have to witness the violation. We can't issue a citation from a photograph," Marshall said.
"It's a bit of a gray area," he added, because state code doesn't specify the backward installation - a federal regulation does.
Spears' rep did not return calls for comment yesterday.
"We strongly urge anyone who is uncertain of how to install a car seat to come down to one of our headquarters and get help. We offer that service free of charge," said Marshall.
We installed car seats for our son in both of our cars about a week before he was born. Before we were allowed to leave the birthing center with our newborn, they checked the car to make sure we had a car seat and that it was installed properly. Britney or one of her handlers didn't know better when they put this seat in her new car, and obviously no one bothered to make sure it met regulations.
If she does get some kind of warning for this, it won't be her first. She's being monitored by the Department of Children and Family services, and will receive regular visits from the agency as a result of a head injury that eight month-old Sean Preston sustained when his hairchair supposedly snapped. (Although witnesses claimed SP also fell off the couch when Kevin was meant to be watching him, and that could have caused the injury.)
Britney was also famously pictured driving with Sean Preston on her lap, and refused to take responsibility for the incident, blaming the paparrazi for hounding her.
In terms of child endangerment, installing a carseat wrong is dangerous but seems like a legitimate mistake. At least she put him in the carseat this time.
Pictures [via]
I saw some pictures on WENN photo yesterday of Paris and Nicky Hilton pumping gas and getting ready to go to Mother's Day dinner with their mom, and I honest thought "Where is their gift?" (The pictures are low-quality watermarked, but you can see what I mean in the last two rows, below. Look at how messy their car is!)
Now Paris' rep claims that a bag containing $10,000 worth of gifts for ther mom for mother's day was "stolen" from in front of the Hilton mansion:
The younger Hilton "spent three or four hours shopping to put together this wonderful collection of things for her mom," Mintz said.
A delivery person set the package down outside the home's gate to ring the intercom when a passenger in a passing car snatched the gifts.
"A fellow just whizzed by and grabbed the package," Mintz said.
The Hilton family celebrated Mother's Day by going out to dinner, he said.
Now, it's totally possible that this happened, but it sounds like a typical excuse for forgetting to get your mom anything for Mother's Day. We know that Paris and Nicky went shopping on Saturday as they were photographed going to Kitson, but Kitson is a trendy casual store and doesn't sell Christian Dior items. They didnt have any bags with them that would suggest they got anything else. Maybe they went somewhere else, too, but we doubt it. The paparrazi follow them everywhere, and they would have been easily spotted at an upscale boutique if they actually did all this heavy shopping for their mom. Also, why would they have gifts delivered if they were going to see their mother on Sunday? Wouldn't they bring the gifts with them?
There's something about Paris' mom, Kathy, that makes you feel sorry for her. Sure she has more advantages in life than large portions of the planet combined, but she just seems needy and unfulfilled. Her family must take her for granted, but at least they had a nice dinner together on Sunday.
Here are Paris and Nicky on Saturday outside of Kitson and on Mother's Day outside the Ivy restaurant. It's nice that Paris is pumping her own gas. [via] and [via] Paris, Nicky and their mom Kathy are shown at "The Race to Erase MS," above.
Britney Spears has been getting deep beyond her ability to comprehend. She made a couple statements recently that reveal that she's trying to come to terms with the spiritual side of life, and is failing miserably.
She made a strange brief statement on her website, her first in over a year, saying she's given up Kabbalah.
She is also quoted as saying that she considers herself a sort of prophet:
Britney, you may not have realized it consciously at the time, but when you have sex without protection you can get pregnant. So you had more of a biology revelation when writing that song than a spiritual awakening.
It's a good thing Britney has given up the Kabbalah cult, though. She doesn't need any more complications in her life.
Britney is pregnant with her second child, which is rumored to be a girl.
Here she is with an unknown male outside a studio in Hollywood on 5/12. Kevin Federline is shown on the same day outside another studio.
Pictures [via]
Jessica Simpson is said to be enamored with James Blunt and wanted to make sure she gave him her contact info at the MTV Australian music awards:
Blunt may be a sensitive singer, but he's a complete dumb ass and iit would be a disaster if these two got together. While Nick was able to balance out Jessica's ditziness with common sense and a grounded personality, Blunt has no such redeeming qualities.
Here is Jessica with her incompetent hairdresser Ken Paves at Mr. Chow's in Beverly Hills on May 2nd, and shopping with him on April 30th. [via]
And here's Blunt at a press conference in Mexico City on May 2nd and at Coachella.
Tom Cruise and Jamie Oliver appeared on The Late Show with David Letterman last night. CBS has a video clip (link leads to page, not direct video) of the episode, but I turned off pop-up blocking in both Firefox and IE and could not get it to work. It's probably because I refuse to install RealPlayer. Maybe you'll have better luck with it.
Tom has written a rambling article for Time's 100 People Who Shape Our World issue in which he praises MI3 director J.J. Abrams. His writing reminds me of this crazy guy I worked for in 1998 who ran a dot com. He used words like synergy and turn-key and it was impossible to figure out what he was talking about. (Here's a web economy bullshit generator that can give you a good idea.)
Some choice excerpts from Tom's article:
From the very beginning, there was an insouciance that promised anything was possible. He's a creative juggernaut and someone who recognizes the joy of creating.
Doesn't Tom have someone that could have edited this for him? It's terrible!
David Blaine is pretty cool when he's doing magic. His low key personality and willingness to approach anyone make his brand of street magic unique and realistic. I saw a special on cable that featured Blaine levitating a foot off the ground. The different groups of people who saw him do it up close really believed that he had some kind of supernatural power.
When the novelty of street magic wore off a few years ago, Blaine started pulling Houdini-type capers. He was buried in a coffin in New York city for a week in 1999, enclosed in a glass of ice for three days in 2000, and stood on a platform for two days straight in 2002. Blaine tried to bring his stunts to new masochistic heights by encasing himself in an acrylic box over the Thames River in London without food or entertainment for 44 days in the fall of 2003. The stunt was successful but foolish and Blaine drew mixed reviews for his public sacrifice. Drunken Londoners ridiculed him and hurled food and beer at his see-through box.
Blaine now plans on living in an aquarium for seven days in New York City's Lincoln center.
He will conclude by attempting to hold his breath underwater longer than the record of 8 minutes, 58 seconds.
The finale of his latest stunt will air live in a two-hour ABC special on May 8 (8 p.m. EDT).
The guy is trying to cling to his fading star by pulling yet another outrageous stunt. It's unnecessary and stupid, and if he wants to make a pile of cash he can surely tour Vegas instead of toturing himself for our entertainment.
It's obviously incredibly hard to hold your breath for that long under water, especially after your body is totally worn out from being submerged for a week. I saw a super-fit guy who had been training for years try to break the record for holding your breath under water on "Wetten Das?" He fell a half minute or so short of the record when he was distracted by Bon Jovi flirting with his girlfriend on the other side of the glass.
Blaine has supposedly been training with the Navy Seals for the stunt, but we doubt he will successfully hold his breath for that long.
His last gig was as the spokesperson for the 2006 New York City summer reading program, though, so you can hardly blame him for trying to remain relevant.
Here is Blaine "bringing magic to libraries" as part of NY's summer reading program:
Victoria Beckham wore a tank top in 5 degree weather while in the French Alps this week. She paraded around on the snow for photographers, and wisely put on a jacket before hitting the slopes.
The mum-of-three didn't seem to feel the cold - or maybe she was just basking in the attention of all the photographers.
Still, unlike her most recent ski trip, Victoria, 31, at least made it out on the piste in the French resort of Courchevel.
Beckham wore a marginally more practical leather ski outfit for her last outing on the slopes.
Beckham has been rumored to be pregnant with her fourth child with soccer star David Beckham. We would say it's probably not true since she's been spotted drinking, but Gwyneth Paltrow has shown that you only have to be British at heart to justify fetal alcohol syndrome.
Pictures [via]
Four more pictures after the jump.
Continue reading "Victoria Beckham skis in the nude... almost" »
Posted to Beckham | Photos | SmartSmartSmart | Victoria Beckham
Jessica Simpson is so juvenile that she can come up with no better way to exact revenge than to crank call the woman who used to date her ex husband.
Simpson reportedly hates Kristin Cavallari and Star reports that she has been crank calling her!
Though a rep for Jess denies the story, the source claims: “She’ll ring Kristin up and just say nothing or try to order pizza or Chinese food and talk in different accents! She’s even gotten some of her friends in on it. The pranks are harmless, but I think Jessica likes knowing that she’s irritating Kristin in some way.”
We did this shit in seventh grade, remember? The fact that she tries to do accents makes it even lamer. Jessica you're supposed to do real damage to the woman who's dating your estranged husband. But he's with MTV VJ Vanessa Minnillo this week, so you didn't even pick the right target.
Here's Simpson at Barneys in LA today with her ever-present hairdresser, who is either carrying most of her bags for her or was more successful at shopping today.
Pictures [via]
Starpulse has a story stating that little people organizations are outraged that Britney hired people of small stature to entertain her husband at his birthday party in Atlanta. We could find no press releases or official statements confirming this, although it does seem obvious that her actions would upset people:
At the party, hosted in a Las Vegas, Nevada restaurant, two female dwarves were reportedly employed to carry in Kevin Federline's 28th birthday cake, while another dressed as a miniature Sonny Bono alongside a Cher look-alike.
Horrified sources claim boozy guests giggled and cheered, with some jokingly suggesting a dwarf-throwing contest.
But dwarf groups are enraged at the appearances, insisting the stunt was demeaning.
A member of America's Billy Barty Foundation - named after the late diminutive Hollywood veteran - says, "It is wicked to hurl abuse at anyone of diminished height simply because they are small.
"We know dwarves and midgets who are immense in stature because of their talent.
"Mostly they are able to rise above any insults. But inevitably, feelings are hurt by nasty comments. There's only one word for it - bullying."
When we first reported that Britney hired dwarves to entertain her husband, we noted that "People who mock little people are ignorant and stupid." It's like hiring someone in black face for laughs, and Britney deserves plenty of criticism for this.
Here are some little people organizations so that we can all be a little more enlightened about how offensive Britney's actions were. (Again, there are no official press releases, but it may be helpful to get someone else's point of view.)
- Dwarfism.org, which notes that the term "midget" is highly offensive
- The Children of Difference Foundation
- Little People of America
Britney is said to be due in September if she's really pregnant. We don't think that dumb bitch should produce any more children, and hope that the nanny can drum some sense into SP, because he doesn't have much of a chance with the parents he's got.
Here's Britney getting her hair done and talking on the phone yesterday. [via]
7 more pictures after the jump.
Continue reading "Britney Spears is worse than insensitive" »
Posted to Babies | Britney Spears | Kevin Federline | Photos | SmartSmartSmart
Pink, trying desperately to make a comeback, is spouting a lot of crap to the press to try to drum up publicity for her album coming out this week, "I'm Not Dead." Britian's Mirror gossip rag, 3am, devotes its entire issue to Pink and has scads of dumb quotes from the singer, who uses a punk image to exploit teens who want to rebel but aren't cool enough to discover real music.
Pink speaks out on everything from webcam sex to feminism:
Pink is completely happy with a stripper's pole between her legs, so we don't know why she's bitching about it.
Pink obviously doesn't care how she comes off as long as she's quoted. Her single, "Stupid Girls," is only 31 on the Billboard chart and her last album didn't sell that well:
Paltrow is famous for her rigorous macrobiotic diet, although she altered it the last time she was pregnant, with her daughter, Apple. Some experts recommend a little Guinness for expecting mothers, because of the brew's high iron content.
Her rep confirmed she drank the alcoholic beverage, but said she ate only cooked food, not sushi.
When I was pregnant I would go out for California rolls because they have no raw fish, but are still tasty if you crave some sushi. I never - ever - had a sip of alcohol though. That's obnoxious and Gwyneth should know better. What a dumb bitch she is.
Posted to Babies | Drunk | Gwyneth Paltrow | SmartSmartSmart
In the past two days, Paris Hilton and Jessica Alba have neglected to pay the meter. Hilton's mistake in West Hollywood is made all the richer by the countless paparazzi and onlookers that witnessed the incident. All someone had to do was fish out a quarter to help the girl out, but no one bothered. In the image above, several people are gathered around Hilton's car to mock her misfortne.
Alba received a parking ticket on her Toyota Hybrid on 3/27, while Hilton got the ticket yesterday on her $500,000 SLR McLaren Mercedes Benz. Hilton was at a tanning salon while her car was ticketed.
Six more after the jump.
Continue reading "Paris Hilton and Jessica Alba get parking tickets" »
Posted to Jessica Alba | Paris Hilton | Photos | SmartSmartSmart
K-Fed, you give us so much to work while describing the title of your new album:
First of all, it's hysterical that you're explaining that it's supposed to be self-explanatory. That really brings home your point, thanks.
Next, did you get the fact that it can have more than one meaning? Because maybe then you wouldn't try and emphasize the title of the album, which may have beats that could, er, burn you and all of your listeners. (We are so sorry for pointing this out, and are nearly as bad as K-Fed in that respect.)
K-Fed does not yet have a record contract, but is said to be "weighing his options."
Federline characteristically rebuffed his infinitely more talented wife when she offered to hook him up with her magical producers several months ago.
You can hear a genius one-sample track off his new album on his 1997-era MySpace (launches automatic music).
Posted to Kevin Federline | Music | SmartSmartSmart
Britney and SP shopped with help from her personal assistant and bodyguard at Ralphs grocery store in Malibu yesterday. Seen in her cart were Cheerios (we would guess for SP), Splenda, Skittles, and cans of Coke and Tab. Britney was also spotted with a ready-made salad, so at least part of her diet isn't processed food.
One of the most interesting stories to come out about Britney recently involves the little people exploited at her husband's birthday party:
The following night the pair visited the same club, and Britney arranged for a Cher look-a-like to perform a duet of 'I Got You Babe' with a midget Sonny Bono impersonator...
"Everyone found Britney's surprise really hilarious. Kevin and Britney and their friends were in fits."
That's right, little people are just hysterical.
I saw an HBO America Undercover special called "Dwarfs: Not a fairy tale" a while ago that really opened my eyes:
People who mock little people are ignorant and stupid, and Britney and Kevin reveal how low class they really are with this latest stunt.
Pictures [via]
Four more after the jump.
Continue reading "What's in Britney's cart?" »
Posted to Babies | Britney Spears | Kevin Federline | Photos | SmartSmartSmart
Academy-Award nominated documentary filmmaker Morgan Spurlock angered some and delighted others with a controversial speech at a high school in Pennsylvania on Friday. Spurlock is the creator and star of the film "Super Size Me" which follows his health-damaging experience of eating only McDonalds food for 30 days.
In Spurlock's speech, he is said to have made an off color joke about "retards" and to have used the F word. While some were offended, many students predictably thought the speech was great:
There actually were special education students in the back row. Teachers led them out during the hourlong presentation.
"If you put the whole package together, the use of the F-word and poking fun at teachers and the comments about special-needs students, it just wasn't appropriate," Superintendent William Lessa said.
Most students laughed, gave Spurlock a standing ovation and mobbed him for autographs. But a speech Spurlock was to make at the school later Friday night for community members was canceled.
Spurlock says the school made the outrageous request that he not mention McDonalds in his speech because a member of the school board runs a local franchise. It is possible that his comments were blown out of proportion by hostile adults in the audience, but if he did make a reference to "retards" he deserves the public ire that he's receiving. Everyone knows that the "r" word is cruel and taboo.
Spurlock has yet to comment on the incident in his official blog.
Spurlock recently produced the groundbreaking socially conscious reality series "30 Days" for the FX network. Episodes followed everyday people undergoing life-changing experiences for a month. In one episode, Spurlock and his girlfriend, vegan chef Alex Jamieson, lived on minimum wage for a month in Ohio. Minor health problems and a backbreaking work schedule helped them realize firsthand how difficult it is for hardworking Americans to make ends meet. The Season One DVD of 30 Days will be available in June.
Posted to Morgan Spurlock | SmartSmartSmart
Jennifer Aniston is digging herself into a deep, dark hole from which her career will never recover. Only a select few people in this world are given the advantages in life that Aniston shits on every time she opens her mouth.
Her latest quotes, of which there are plenty, are just full of gratitude for her charmed existence.
The woman who has most of the world's resources at her disposal is bitching about some furry rabbits in the huge front lawn of the massive mansion she lives in:
"There's rabbit s**t everywhere. Those bunnies are the bane of my existence."
All she has to do is pick up the phone and ask someone to come over. She can probably even get the guys who created Wallace and Gromit to come over with a working BunnyVac. When you have the kind of cash that Aniston does, you're truly a petty person if you let some little rabbits get to you.
You're also stupid if you rip on the entertainment industry that made you an ungrateful star, but of course she does it anyway.
"And then the ripping people to shreds. Humiliation. Degradation. What is going on? There's so much instant gratification, and we want it.
"It's just bizarre. I don't watch TV anymore," confessed Aniston. "Nothing. I have no interest in that idol sh*t."
Aniston, there are devices that help you avoid unwanted television programs. They're called a Tivo, a Replay TV, or you can even get a Media Center PC. Again, pick up the phone and ask for some help. The next time you need help around the house, please do us a favor and consult the yellow pages instead of complaining to the reporters that hover around you.
We are glad that you are moving to Chicago to live with your bloated paramour, Vince Vaughn. Please refrain from speaking to reporters there, and ask Vince to help you with minor problems around the house.
Also, this other shit you said about how the paparrazi bothers you and how men came on to you while you were married, we really don't care. Please review Mischa Barton's latest interview, and take notes on how to respond to reporters.
Posted to Arrogant | Jennifer Aniston | SmartSmartSmart
Natalie Portman crosses over into dangerous Gwyneth Paltrow territory by comparing actresses who do it for the money to whores:
She said: "I don't want to ever be working for money because then you are no different to a prostitute."
Portman, just because you wear vegan shoes and give college lectures for publicity doesn't mean you're any better than other actresses.
Not only are you stupid and arrogant, you're also a hypocrite.
Even though you do ads in Japan that doesn't mean we don't know about them. Were you appearing in these shampoo commercials for the sheer challenge of portraying a young woman with glossy hair? You must be terribly ashamed for selling your body for some cash two years ago.
Posted to Arrogant | Natalie Portman | SmartSmartSmart | Video
First of all, Mortimer is a nickname Paltrow made up and isn't even Speilberg's real name, which is really Steven Spielberg.
Second, there's a reason why only old Jewish men are named Mortimer - it's a weird creepy name that is deservedly out of fashion.
We hope this rumor is false or that Paltrow changes her mind. The girl is a pompous laughing stock and she should get therapy from a non new-age source.
Posted to Babies | Gwyneth Paltrow | SmartSmartSmart
We have no idea why Pamela Anderson is wearing a cheerleader outfit, but the possibilities are not endless. We're sure the 39 year-old has a good excuse for trying to escape from the cameras while dressed as a cheerleader and carrying a napkin.
Pam looks pretty hot despite recent partying, and clearly keeps herself in good shape. She has attributed her health to a vegetarian diet and eating lots of Avacados, which she says keep her Hepatitis C at bay.
She also said that now that she's getting up in years she is considering having another child:
“But if I do have more kids it’ll have to be soon - before I’m 40.”
“Maybe I have to find a good sperm donor.”
We would assume that caring for ten children is not the same as looking after two, and think that Anderson will have little trouble finding a sperm donor, as evidenced by these pictures.
Anderson also recently admitted to having a love-hate relationship with her boobs. While she seems to give a lot of stupid quotes, they don't seem rude or conceited and both Eva Longoria and Jennifer Aniston would do better to emulate Anderson.
Here is Anderson dressed up as a cheerleader. These pictures were taken in Malibu on 3/17. [via]
Train wreck Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty, who recently reconciled with shit-for-brains supermodel Kate Moss, is so mired in his addictive ways that he openly did crack, heroin and ecstasy in front of a Rolling Stone reporter. He also offered the reporter a taste of everything, except crack, which Doherty is known to adore.
Doherty most recently proved that he's on crack by befriending Mike Tyson.
A little love from kooky Kate and a vacation in the south of France might help him sober up, but we doubt it.
Eva Longoria shows how arrogant and annoying she is in every interview. In the new issue of Allure she reveals that she's only the second woman her boyfriend Tony Parker has slept with, and brags about how whipped she has him:
She also clears up speculation that they will soon walk down the aisle: "No, no, no. But we know exactly what we want in our future."
"Our children will speak French," she adds.
Parker appreciates her "plucky" attitude, Longoria tells the magazine.
"Since I grew up in Texas, I'm like the people he's gotten used to around San Antonio instead of being a Hollywood actress who's selfish and arrogant and full of herself ... and screamy," she says.
What a stupid bitch. She's saying she's not a selfish, arrogant, and screamy actress. That's like saying she's not a petite brunette.
She has one of those cute conversations with her boyfriend like "oh, our kids will be into sports" and repeats it to a magazine like it's substantial information about her future.
I really hope Tony breaks up with her after he finds out that she repeats their pillow talk. He may be a good guy, but he can't be that much of a pushover.
Posted to Arrogant | Eva Longoria | SmartSmartSmart
Normally that is not news, but there's a video of a very drunk Tara getting into her car. She must not be able to afford a cab. [via]
We cannot contain our delight at today's news that Cameron and Justin are taking advantage of the brief ice skating "craze" to create and star in a ice skating-themed romance movie:
By the time they finish this flop the public will not give a shit about ice skating. The Olympics are finished, Skating with Celebrities has wrapped, and no one will care about ice skating a month from now. The only reason people will watch this is to see Cameron in tiny outfits.
Everyone also knows that it's incredibly stupid to make a film with your significant other. The Sun recaps:
BEN AFFLECK and J-LO’s appalling Gigli came just before they split — and their careers have never recovered.
Eyes Wide Shut is not regarded as one of TOM CRUISE or NICOLE KIDMAN’s finest works. They divorced in 2001, two years after the film, STANLEY KUBRICK’s last, came out.
Gigli on ice - we can't wait!
Posted to Business ventures | Cameron Diaz | Justin Timberlake | Movies | SmartSmartSmart
The track list on Paris' upcoming album was announced today in a published interview. Fox News, grateful to be granted five minutes of the heiress' time, edited out her spiteful comments, fed her lines, and credited her with intelligence and wit far beyond her ability to comprehend:
Me: “But really you’re not getting married or anything, are you?”
Her: “Are you crazy? I’m 25. No way.”
Me: “In fact, you don’t need these boyfriends do you? They’re just ornaments.”
Her: “That’s right.”
She has not-so-nice things to say about her ex-pal Nicole Richie. They’re probably printable, but hey — this isn’t the Star.
Paris' three word remarks do smack of irony, don't they? Someone talks in a normal voice and suddenly they're brilliant.
The song list on Paris' new CD must also be ironic, because surely it's not just moronic and predictable:
That's right, Paris is doing a cover of Rod Stewart's "Do You Think I'm Sexy." Many people think you're sexy, Paris, and now at least one guy at Fox thinks you're clever, too. [via]
Posted to Paris Hilton | SmartSmartSmart
Cult expert Rick Ross reports that Katie Holmes' friendship with Victoria Beckham is not all that it seems, and that Tom and Katie have been working together to recruit the Beckhams into Scientology:
“Victoria has become a mother hen to Katie and was thrilled when she asked her to be her birthing partner. Victoria remembers how scary it was when she had her first child. She can’t imagine how difficult it will be for Katie to give birth [Scientology style] quietly and without any pain killers” a source told the press.
Well, maybe all that pain will be worth it if Scientology’s top star can recruit the most popular British celebs outside the royal family.
The Beckhams certainly are dumb enough to get recruited into Scientology, and it would not be surprising if they converted.
It's amazing how many celebrities get recruited into dangerous and expensive cults. Other celebrities involved in Scientology include Kelly Preston, John Travolta, Juliette Lewis, Kirstie Alley, Jason Lee, and musician Beck.
Katie is due to give birth in a month or two depending on who you believe. Life and Style, not known for accuracy, reported twice in mid-February that the two had split. Cruise threatened to sue over the story, but did not follow through.
Posted to Beckham | Cults | Katie Holmes | SmartSmartSmart | Tom Cruise | TomKat | Victoria Beckham
Jennifer Love Hewitt feels sorry for her troubled fans, and spends an inordinate amount of time listening to their problems and trying to help them. She's especially bothered when she can't channel her on-screen character, the ghost whisperer, to help widows speak to their dead husbands:
She explains, "... a part of me really feels bad that I can't help these people. "I had this woman come up to me and she was so sweet, she was probably 75 and we're sitting there talking and she's telling me how on Friday nights she gets together with her husband and they hold hands on the couch and they eat their favourite meal and they watch the show and how she never misses it and she loves it. "Like 20 minutes into the conversation, I realised that her husband was dead. "She likes the show because she thinks her husband comes to spend time with her then, but I was broken-hearted because I didn't know how to be the Ghost Whisperer in real life. "I was like, 'What do I do?' You can't fake your way through something like that. It was really hard."
JLove spoke to a crazy old woman for 20 minutes, and instead of walking away annoyed, she felt guilty that she couldn't help her! Honey, no one can help someone who thinks they watch TV with their dead spouse.
On February 26th JLove hosted the LA County "Race for the Cure" to benefit the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. She wanted to "honor her aunt who was recently diagnosed with breast cancer and is undergoing treatment." [via]
She has to be the kindest celebrity ever.
Here are some Ghost Whisperer promotion photos. Pictures of J.Love speaking at the "Race for the Cure" are after the jump. [via] and [via]
Continue reading "Old people confuse JLove with ghost whispering TV character" »
Carmen Electra's shoddy logic reveals how much of a ho she really is. She went the opera as a paid guest of an Austrian businessman who is known for hiring actresses to accompany him to the event. She thought he really wanted sex, though, so she took the money and left early!
But Carmen has never heard of Lugner and thought that the invitation to Thursday's event to be an lewd proposal. According to the AP, "She forced her benefactor to present a statutory declaration that he wasn't expecting an intimate date and banned him from picking her up at Vienna airport."
Richard says, "She thought I was looking for a sexual adventure and emphasized that she is a married woman. Every year I go with my wife and my child and pick up my guest at the airport. My wife is always with me. I even told her management that she can bring her husband (Dave Navarro) as well, even if he's all covered with tattoos and you can only see his fingernails."
When the two eventually met, their date was very brief due to Carmen bolting from the scene, insisting that her tight low-cut dress wasn't short enough to waltz in.
Hollywood Tuna reports that Electra was paid a mere $1,255 dollars, but they seem to have confused the cost of the evening with the unknown amount paid to Electra to serve as an escort. Hopefully Electra thinks her sexual favors are worth at least five figures.
Posted to Carmen Electra | SmartSmartSmart
Scott Stapp, lead singer of Creed and star of a recently released amateur sex tape featuring Kid Rock, thinks people care enough about him to try to ruin his career:
"You don't want to say it's laughable, but it's just like, my God, there's so much stuff," he said. "Somebody does not like you and somebody wants you to fail."
He went on to say "they're just jealous!" (Ok, I made that part up.)
Stapp is quite good at failing on his own, and was arrested in LAX for public drunkenness a mere day after his second wedding.
Posted to Scott Stapp | Sex Tapes | SmartSmartSmart
Proving that she doesn't know her alphabet, Paris Hilton confuses the D with the A list:
And Hilton has no qualms about putting herself in direct competition with the Oscar-winning star.
She explains, "My acting coach told me I have a similar style of acting to [Charlize Theron] so we may end up vying for the same parts."
Seriously. What would this guy do if he wasn't an athlete? Most manual labor jobs require more sense. From Reuters via Oh no they didn't:
The England captain and Real Madrid midfielder was forced to call on his wife Victoria, a former member of the Spice Girls pop group, to help their son Brooklyn with a school assignment because the footballer found the sums too difficult.
"Their homework is so hard these days," Beckham, 30, said in an interview with the Mail on Sunday. "It's totally done differently to what I was teached when I was at school, and you know I was like 'Oh my God, I can't do this'."
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